NOTE; this 1st part may or may not be a true. I’ll leave it up to you to decide for yourself.
I noticed a horse standing with his legs hidden behind a bush. Curious as to what he was up to. I walked over to ask him. Fortunately he was an English speaking horse (an English speaking horse in France I hear you ask? What a stroke of luck). I said HAAAAY there horsey, why are you so keen to hide away your legs behind that bush there?”
He was like “can you please not call me horsey? Call me Stephen Hendry. All my friends do”
I apologised to Stephen Hendry and said “stop avoiding the leg question dude. What’s going on?”
He rolled his big horse eyes to the back of his big horse head and sighed “because in comparison to your RIPPED pins, I just feel so embarrassingly inferior”.
I looked down at my own toned beasts and just had to agree that they were looking pretty hench. As I walked away I laughed to myself thinking ‘I can’t believe I said ‘hay’ to a horse…….
Anyway, on the cycling side of things. I had the little task of the Col des Egyaux to get over. Only at 914m in altitude and my only real climb of note of the day. Once I got over it, I headed to the nearest town to stock up on some calories. It was a town called Veynes. It seemed to have some sort of plastic recycling festival/market going on.
The first 30 miles of the day were real steady Eddie. Up a little bit, down a little bit. To be honest I got a little bored. Perhaps I’ve just been spoilt rotten recently in terms of amazing cycle routes with the scenery to match.
Arriving in Sisteron, the boredom of the parcours was lifted. Sisteron was an old medevail town, that appeared to be surviving from tourism from the beauty and architecture of its once grander times (not too dissimilar to Warwick in that sense)
In the middle of the town there was a good sized swimming pool that enticed me in for a dip. A dip was all it was, as it was far too fucking cold for my liking.
With the Alps rapidly disappearing behind me, and the super slick rick roads beneath me, I was back on top of the world. I resorted to some comedy in the form of a podcast. I tried out a new one called ‘The fighter and the kid’. Once again I had to pull over for a good cry, this time though I was howling with laughter. The podcast was tickling me in all the right ways.
Very stupidly, whilst trying to photograph a tasty sunset on the move, I ran right over a pot hole and punctured. It was time for a tire change also, as I managed to munch my way through my continental gatorskins in less than a month
With the sun now fully gone, I pitched my tent in the nearest field I came across I’m a sub 5 minute, record breaking 4:51 (in the fucking dark). Look out crummy!!!
“Mr Blue sky, please tell us why, you had to hide away for so long “
-Electric Light Orchestra”